I quit in order to travel.
"Are you a pensioner? "No, adventurer I prefer!"
A June 4 in Paris. Return to the office after a week of vacation (learning to) surf in the Canary Islands.
10:35 a.m., I send a whatsapp to a colleague at work to tell her that things are not going well (anymore). I love my box and the vibrant ecosystem in which I swirl… I almost love my routine but I no longer thrive. I even feel regressed and unstimulated. This does not PLEASE me anymore!
11:05 a.m., she tells me not to make any decision randomly and without a minimum of thought. "Don't quit Claudia, take the week to 'acclimate' to your return from vacation and you'll see." "Thank you Mr. you were my trigger!" ".
11:16 a.m., I get up from my office, walk with a determined step towards the assistant of my +2, the DirCom of my box. Appointment taken the next day at 9:45 am. "He'll give you 10 minutes, okay with that? " " Yes! ".
9:45 am, the next day, my resignation is officially announced to my boss.
This is followed by an announcement to my +1, then letter recce to the HRD. An attempt at conditional termination or a request for training for retraining is obviously undertaken. Null result. "You wish to leave, you leave. "Okay, fair enough."
And then: lost or liberated?
After 5 years of good and loyal service, I realize that there are still numbers and that my resignation is a godsend to maintain the good turnover figures of the box which must show a 2-3%, showing its "good health ".
Ok but my health to me in all this?
She is doing just fine. And this decision, to be honest, did not happen when I was struggling somehow the week before to get on my board when the wave was not supposed to reach 50cm!
It's a thoughtful decision but one that's still scary.
Scary? Yes, because some people act in ways that others would call head-scratching. So when you are looking for "comfort", to be reassured in your "future but not so far" announcement, you will always be surrounded by friends, colleagues who will try to discourage you.
This is not to be perceived as wickedness or a brake on your (crazy) desires, but simply as a projection of their emotions. My friend-turned-coworker tried to discourage me because she wouldn't have had "the trips or the courage" to make such a decision.
Thoughtful decision or stroke of madness?
I stopped hiding my face and I freely admit that the idea has been mulling over in the back of my head for a year. But the observation is quite incisive: Did you have time to watch the ads? no. Have you had time to run your network? no.
Having a "passionate" and whole nature, I have always been 200% involved and my decisions are clear and irreversible. I need to love and give my all in my work and to have an inspiring boss, you know, the famous one who makes you grow wings on all your projects.
There comes a day, a morning, an end of PM, where you wonder if you are "useful", if you still find pleasure, if you haven't reached the end of what you can deliver. Does this job make me vibrate and flourish?
The answer was known in advance, but when you venture to talk about it around you, the famous "But what do you want to do?" "Have you looked elsewhere?" "It's not easy right now!" » …
Some will say you're crazy, others (your parents, let's face it) will be exhausted by this kind of behavior but you don't want to pretend anymore. You need to feel alive. So, no, I am not an annuitant, I have not touched an inheritance and even less become a scratch card millionaire, but I am courageous, adventurous and aware that "time flies".
So happy?
The first reaction is felt.
Personal development books sit at the foot of my bed, Anthony Robbins* becomes my spiritual mentor, I subscribe to Instagram accounts of “inspirational phrases” a la Foundr, Befitquotation, and successful entrepreneurs.
Between 2 songs by the latest Orelsan or dj Snake, I listen thoroughly to American coaching podcasts, including Brooke Castillo* who will help me make my choices thanks to an overdose of her 295 episodes "Overcoming fear" "How to set priorities "How to feel"...
And then, one morning, everything becomes reality, the LeBoncoin and Geev apps take place on my smartphone, I sell my clothes, sign my termination of lease, and start dreaming...of writing, volunteering, relearning the harmonica.
This tiny little nest egg present on my savings account bringing in 1.3% taxable interest per year which slept wisely to give me this false impression, this false hope that one day I will own a 17m² apartment in Paris will FINALLY be used to buy the bricks that shape my mental well-being.
I do not encourage "wild" resignation, to dump everything overnight. It's a painful act to sell all your goods, your decoration, this "material" that has gravitated around me during these 5 years in Paris, to terminate all the administrative paperwork. It's scary to think that you don't have professional plans "behind".
See this as a testimony. From the moment you have this small voice in you, listen to it. And sometimes even, trust him!
*Anthony Robbins, American, life coach, philanthropist, author of 6 best-selling books*Brooke Castillo, co-founder and CEO of the online school Life coach school