What's wrong with your job? Do you want to change?
Ok, it happens, and it does not matter. You are not alone in this case. For me who is writing to you at the moment, this is sometimes the case. Uneasiness, doubts, I had them, I have them, and I will have them again in the future.
Start by asking yourself.
To clear your mind, start by taking a break, doing something that makes you feel good, that helps you breathe better and relax. Asking yourself will allow you to take a step back. Then, take advantage of this step back to ask yourself about your relationship to work: what do you expect from a job? What do you need to feel good about it? what makes you feel good about your job today? What do you like to do ? What do you need to have a balance between your professional and personal life?
Matthieu Tellier worked in HR management in the army, then 7 years in a consulting firm that supports psychosocial risks in large companies and recently launched his consulting firm to manage conflicts and coach managers in companies. With his experience in work psychology and HR, Matthieu talks to us about the importance of “posing oneself” and brings us his view on how to question our relationship to work.
Question your relationship to work
“The first question is: what does it mean to be generally successful in my life? Is it like having a Porsche at 40? Is it having a job with an impact with a family, an organic garden and rabbits?
This question leads to other questions:
- Who am I working for? for me ? for customers? for a team, a box, to feed my children...?
- Who will define my role? Who defines that I work well? what does a job well done mean?
What do I actually have to do?
All this requires a certain number of actions, the first is to start by asking yourself.
What I see with the managers that I accompany and who are in catastrophic states, is that they are in this kind of spiral of undergoing everything that happens in their professional or personal life and they never take a break to say: what are my priorities for the week, professional or personal? What is my role? Where am I in my mission? How do I project myself into the future? What do I want in my life? for my career? in 6 months ? in 1 year?
And all these questions: where am I? or I'll ? if we don't ask ourselves them regularly, we go where the company takes us.
The starting point is to ask yourself. Then ask yourself the right questions, structure a certain number of projects. Without forgetting the obvious: pay attention to your body, play sports, enjoy nature, interact with people, have good team relations, communicate with your boss, take the time to laugh. Do everything that makes us feel good on a daily basis in order to stop suffering. The starting point is to set stops regularly and land.
Yes but I can't, I don't have time
"See you in 6 months! I'll explain how you did a nice burn out."
“ok you don’t have time but at what cost? What happens to you at the end of the day? At the end of the week in your body, in your personal life, in your work? Does it work ? And if it works, good for you. If that doesn't work, we can talk."
The relationship we have with our work is also linked to the image we want to give of ourselves: if I have decided to be this person who is always available, reliable, perfect, useful, necessarily people around me know that I'm reactive, that I respond well, I create this environment which creates this indirect satisfaction of "I return the image that I have chosen."
Your advice for taking a step back and calming down?
“Delegate, take breaks, sit down to eat, stop working evenings and weekends, eliminate guilt, delegate, accept imperfect work. *It's hard to move someone who is not in this step back. That's why the first thing is to take stock regularly, otherwise we get overwhelmed.
To switch to introspection mode and reflect on yourself, here are some tools
- Our selection of skills assessments
- Join the paumé·e·s community to talk to other people in the same situation as you
Books and articles that can help you...
- Foutez-vous la paix - Fabrice Midal
- Une pause - les colibris français